A Loss.

It's expected that you grieve at the loss of a child that everyone knew, loved and misses.

But how do you explain that you are grieving for the loss of a child you never knew?

Or that may have never been born?

It is impossible.

Unless you are doing it.

We are doing it.

We are grieving.

Even though we never held a baby in our arms. With a name. A closet full of clothes. A favorite blankie. We are grieving.

It is a loss when adoption doesn't happen the way you had hoped and dreamed it would.

Our 5 year adoption journey is now at a close.

But please don't cry for me Argentina!

We grieve, but we are at peace.

And Daniel and I know we have the most bestest and greatest and most dynamic kids in the whole world! Seriously! We do. If you don't believe me, come see!

I would like to thank those who have helped us travel this 5 year journey. Thank you for your prayers. Thank you for your fasts. Thank you for taking us to the temple with you. Thank you for your tears, your concern, your genuine interest in the growth of our family. Thank you for sharing our pass along cards. Thank you for thinking of us when certain circumstances had you thinking of us. Thank you for putting our pass along cards on your blogs and up at the gym and grocery store. Thank you to each of you whose shoulders were wet from my tears. Thank you to each of you who, when I said I was okay, knew better and gave loving hugs. Thank you to our families who willingly supported, fasted and prayed. Thank you to my adoption friends who “know” and know that I love and appreciate you!

Please understand that we are not ready to talk about our most recent experience. Hugs and kind words are greatly appreciated.