Once Upon A Time... Part 7

Jim and I had a break together that next Monday. He was great. He made me laugh. He said the right things. He thought I was totally great. How can you resist that?

When we got back to work, I noticed he had emailed me. He said he would like to make me dinner and have me meet his son. I emailed back that that would be terrific. He emailed back that this was like the movie You've Got Mail...the emailing back and forth. So cute.

Then something happened. I can't believe my luck with dating lately! My good friend Shelia (yes, that's spelled correctly) came and asked if she could talk to me. Sure! So I took another break. She asked if I was serious with that guy.

"You mean Jim?"

"Yes."

"Umm. We just started seeing each other, why?"

" I want you to come talk to a friend of mine."

"Ok."

So we walked over to her friend's desk. Now let me describe this to you in detail. Picture a beautiful girl. Really. She's gorgeous. Now put some metal through her lips, eyebrows, cheek, other unseemly places, tattoos on her arms, neck, back, etc. Black eyeliner, thick. Dark red lipstick. (Am I forgetting anything, Katie?) Oh, and jet black hair that was long on one side and cropped really short on the other. Seriously. She was gorgeous, she just hid it well. But I shouldn't deter from the point. She got off her call and started to tell me her experience dating Jim. He just wanted s*x, when she wouldn't put out right off, he hit her. He hit other women, too. Namely, his x-wives. That's why he was divorced. He has a temper. He doesn't go to church. She didn't even know he was religious. He didn't see his son that often. When she told him she didn't want to see him anymore, he was always outside her apartment, waiting for her. He would call her and knock on her door in the middle of the night. He was a stalker. She had a restraining order on him.

Does this raise a few red flags? Ummm.... YES!!!!

Now what? I seriously could not think of what to do next. I had another date set up with him. I went over to talk to Dave. I wanted to make sure he understood what he had set me up with. He had no idea. He was pretty shocked, too. I asked him if he thought Jim would hurt me if I told him to leave me alone. He didn't think so. That wasn't the Jim he knew. He said he would watch out for me, though.

I asked another friend, Natalee, to come out to the cafateria with me. I told her the whole sordid affair. What was wrong with me? Wait a minute. There's nothing wrong with me! I just seem to attract these weirdos. I have a track record...high school. I realized the difference in the 2 women he recently wooed. The "tattoo, pierced girl" and "chastity's poster child". So opposite! Now what? I couldn't go out with him again! Please! Natalee stayed with me for a while. Soon, I needed to get back to work and on our walk back in, we met up with my team leader and another co-worker. Of course they knew something was wrong. I was still crying. They wanted to know if they should talk to him. No. I needed to. I was forming a plan with their help.

I sat down at my desk for a minute. Then I went to take care of business. I walked to his desk. He was just sitting and talking to a bunch of guys from his team. They all saw me coming, red faced and tear streaked, and got really quiet. I asked Jim if he would come to the cafeteria to talk. He stood right up and followed me. Wow! This sounds so dramatic.

We sat down and I noticed my team leader, Natalee, Dave and Shelia at various spots in the room. I was covered. I think they were all expecting a fight or something. I told him I was in bad shape. I had just broken up with a boyfriend and realized I wasn't ready to be dating again. (I said boyfriend for effect, I NEVER considered Ken a boyfriend!! Yuck!) He was so nice. He said he understood. He also asked if I would remember him when I was ready to date again. I said yes. I knew that I wouldn't be ready for him again. He gave me a hug and walked back to his desk.

My friends all came to give me hugs and encouragement. They took turns walking me out to my car after work and someone was always waiting for me to walk me into work each morning. I was never alone while at work. My parents were on guard. They made sure I was safe at home. I never felt that I was in danger.

And with that, I was officially done dating. This experience was the final straw in my dating career. I knew that changes needed to come and I was ready to do what was necessary.