Monday, November 22, 2010

Adoption Friendships.

So what else have I learned during this long wait for another child? I wish I could share it all with you. But, again, I am doing highlights.

Today I want to talk about the friendships.

The China paper chase process began almost 5 years ago. When our agency people came to visit us and begin, they mentioned a family who was also starting the process who lives just 5 minutes away. They said they know us! I was a tad confused. Who else is going to China that lives 5 minutes away and knows us? No one had said anything to us. Then they explained.

That began a friendship that I have cherished. Kim, Jon and their daughter Jessica. Jon is actually a brother to Daniel's sister's hubby. Did that make sense? So we had seen each other and chatted every once in a while at family gatherings for Daniel's sister and Jon's brother and their family. But now, with China in our sights, Kim and I became very close.

We spend our summers at the dollar movies with our kids. And let me tell you about our kids. Jessica and Ruthann are like long lost sisters when they're together. I love the time our kids can spend together. Kim and I meet for lunch often. We confide in each other. Church callings, adoption, raising our adopted daughters, marriage, home, extended family, China, and anything else that comes to mind.

Recently Kim and Jon looked into the Special Needs program in China. And guess what?! They found their daughter!! They are getting all the paperwork done so they can go get her and bring her home. I am so thrilled for them. Jessica will be 10 soon. I think she's ready to be a big sister.

Another friendship I cherish is Leanne's. One day, while in the paper chase process, I got a phone call. She said she was with the same agency and wanted to know more about adopting from Guatemala. I was happy to talk adoption, but told her I didn't know anything at all about Guatemala's program. She meant China. We talked quite a bit. I can do that about China adoption. We became fast friends.

Leanne and I used to get together often for lunch to talk about adoption, our agency, children and other things. You wanna know something amazing about Leanne? She adopted her daughter almost 2 years ago. I knew her as a single lady with no children. Now I know her as a mom. Her daughter is beautiful and Leanne has blossomed into a beautiful mom. We were supposed to go to China together. (at least we hoped we would) I don't know if we will. But I am grateful for the friendship I have with her that I otherwise wouldn't without this long wait.

Those aren't all of them. Andrea is a great lady who still waits with her husband. I hope she goes to China soon!!! Very soon!

I have had phone conversations with others who are also waiting. Who have, in one way or another, affected my life. If we hadn't began the process when we did, Kim and I most likely wouldn't have solidified a friendship that will last forever. If we hadn't began when we did and told our agency that they could give our number to people looking into adopting from China, I would never have gotten that phone call from Leanne. And so many other people would never have touched my life.

And then there are the people who have touched my life just right here at home. I have had people who I have known for a long time confide in me about infertility, adoption, loss, foster care and many other things. Who knew that just having paperwork in China and a profile up through LDSFS that I could connect with so many people.

I will never regret beginning this process. Even if my arms never hold another baby that I call my own. These friendships have been salve to my soul. Thank you Kim. Thank you Leanne. Thank you Andrea. Thank you lady in southern Utah. Thank you perky gal from Salt Lake. Thank you everyone. You really may never know how your friendship has lifted me up.


Kim said...

You know I Love You and am ever grateful for our friendship!!! I never could have got through this without you!!! You're an amazing woman and I am blessed to know you let alone being a friend! What a blessing your family has been and I too love Ruthie and Jess' friendship-here's to many, many more years of lunches, movies and endless chatting!! Happy Thanksgiving!!!! Remember I am grateful for you!

Andrea said...

Awww! That was such a sweet post! You know I cherish you!! All I have to do is look at you and your family and it gives me hope in the knowledge that dreams do come true.

Kim said...

Adoption really is about love! And it comes in the most surprising forms.

Single Women Adopting Children said...

Oh Jennie....this brought tears to my eyes! I cherish our friendship so much....even if we are not able to get together as often as we did. Life, with toddlers, has a way of taking over...particularly as a single mom.

You are an amazing mom and I have learned so much from you! I say the same thing...I don't know what I would do without my adoption friends. I, like you, will likely not hold another baby in my arms but what I really know is you gave me the courage to go for be a mom and like you promised...I LOVE it!

So now that my crazy semester is almost over- when should we do lunch? If not before the holidays soon after.